A Hesitant Welcome to Fall

For maybe the first time ever, I am hesitant for the start of fall. 

Fall has always been my absolute favorite time of the year. The cooler weather. The beautiful colors. Open windows and warm drinks. Hay rides, apple orchards and pumpkins. Bonfires and football. Sweatshirts and boots. A fall rain. Birthdays and anniversaries. The start of a new school year and new school supplies. Homecomings and Outfly. Halloween and candy corn. The season of harvest and combine rides.

While my love of fall has not diminished, I must admit that I'm welcoming this fall season with a touch of hesitancy and melancholy.

This fall season will be my first since the divorce. I'm not sure I understand how to handle that.

How do I reflect on that fateful September weekend? How do I handle the memories of wedding planning or the pictures that show up on social media? Should I expect my birthday to feel different? How do I acknowledge the date of our wedding?

I don't know how to feel about these. I don't know if there should be a specific emotion. It doesn't feel right to just let it all slip by but it also doesn't feel right to make a big fuss.

In addition to all of that, Jacob is starting preschool. And while logically this has to happen and kids grow up, there is still some gut punching feeling of sending your baby off to school. Proud, yet nervous. Excited, yet scared. Happy, yet sad.

His first year of school. A new phase of his life. A new start. A new adventure. A new beginning. It's a bit terrifying. 

We had orientation night the last week of the month and Jacob of course was in heaven, playing with the dinosaurs. And earlier this week, Jacob had his first "conference" where we had a chance to meet his teacher one and one (Jacob played with the dinosaurs) and got his picture taken! 

And in case you've missed the news, I'm starting a new job.

I'll be working as a Marketing Assistant at Eide Bailly. I'm excited and nervous. I'm anxious and trying to stay confident. I'll have a lot to learn as this is a new industry for me, but that's part of the challenge I enjoy. Eide Bailly is a CPA and consulting firm. I think it's going to be a great next step as I continue my career.

I am incredibly sad to be leaving PAH and the amazing team I work with. But part of what I loved about getting a job at Eide Bailly is their willingness to give back to the community. I'm excited to continue supporting PAH, just in a different capacity. 

Fall seems to demand these new and fresh starts. I found this quote on pinterest and it really seems to fit my life. 

Looking back at the month of August, I would say we had a successful last month of summer. Jacob got to spend some time in Iowa at the beginning of the month - something he ALWAYS looks forward to! :) We did manage to freeze some corn this summer. We didn't do any last summer because the crop wasn't great. Let me tell you, freezing corn is not as much fun when there are only three people working! Ha! But we managed! 

We made it to another Tractor Pull as well, but Jacob didn't last as long as I thought he would! Jacob and I also went camping in the backyard on night! This was Jacob's first time in a tent and he was super excited! He was a great helper too when it came to pitching the tent and taking it down. And we also made it to a "On the Move" event where Jacob could go exploring different vehicles like a dump truck, school bus, firetruck, etc. He loved it. 

We took a week vacation and headed north. We had a small cottage on the lake at a resort near Meg's. The weather was a little chillier than we were hoping for, but we still managed to have some boat time out on the lake and Jacob even did a bit of swimming. We visited different parks for some hikes and even drove up to International Falls one day! It was as relaxing as a vacation can be with a four year old. :) 

We also got a State Fair visit in! Jacob was a big fan of the food and really wanted to try out all the rides. Unfortunately time limited us there but we did make it down the big slide once! Megan and I stuck around the cities and went back to the State Fair that night for the Pentatonix concert!! Megan got tickets for her birthday and invited me along. It was amazing! Such a great concert, I wish it would have lasted a lot longer!!  

Looking forward to the next couple of months, things will pick up and be extremely busy as we apparently like to be during this fall season. Jacob will be doing swimming again, which will start at the end of September. There are a couple of fall festivals that we plan on attending around the area and hopefully another visit to Iowa for Jacob! 

I will once again be working part time at Fun.com and might be even crazier for doing that this year on top of a brand new job. But I'm going to give it a shot. And so, if you're willing and able to watch Jacob, let me know. I'll probably take you up on the offer! :) 

Jacob has been asking if it was fall yet for a while. He's been so excited to start school, to ride the combine and to dress up as Frank the Combine (Disney's Cars) for Halloween! :) And speaking of which... I should probably get started on that costume... 

Welcome, Fall. 

Confidence

I feel like a page has been turned. 

**knocking on wood** I don't want to jinx this. 

You know those moments in life that leave you a bit in awe? Those moments that you know are going to a defining moment of your life? 

I think I'm having one of those. 

But let's back up a little first...

I think I've always struggled with my self-confidence. In all areas, but particularly when it comes to my performance at work. It's always been there some, but I had one bad experience at a job that left what little self-confidence I did have pretty much shattered. I struggled for a long time after that. Questioning everything... my purpose; my calling; my past work performances... 

Fast forward about a year and I find a job that I absolutely love. A job back in the field of communications but also working with volunteers and working for an organization that every day was making the difference in people's lives. 

I needed that job. I needed the feeling of purpose. I needed the feeling of making a difference, of feeling accomplished. Little did I know how much I would need the amazing team that I got to work with every day. 

Looking back over the two years I've spent there, I can see some of that self-confidence starting to rebuild. I started to feel better about the work I was doing, even while knowing that it could always be more. I became proud of the work I was doing. Looking back, I can see the clearly successful events; I can see the increase in awareness on such an important issue. I love seeing our hard work recognized. 

Don't get me wrong. I still struggle with my self-confidence. I still struggle with the idea of recognizing my own ideas and promoting them as my own. Honestly, I love doing a good job, seeing the finished product, and knowing it was successful. And I don't want the credit for that. I like the behind-the-scenes aspect. But why shouldn't I own up to my ideas, especially the good ones? 

For example, just recently, I was in a event planning committee meeting. I made a comment along these lines... "At the United Way Kickoff Rally, we had this idea of....." and finished explaining the idea. My ED immediately said, "No, that was your idea and I really like it!" Why is it so hard for me to take credit, to take ownership of my ideas? I know they won't all be good, but still. 

And so we've landed at the present time. I think I've written a bit about this previously, but I've been struggling with the idea of staying in this job I love. When I look at my life now as a single parent, the importance of financial stability and benefits are much stronger. When I look at my career path, I want to be able to see an opportunity for growth, for progress. And while I love what I do, while I love the organization and all that they stand for, while I love my team and the amazing work and difference they make every day, I came to understand that personally, I needed more. 

I started applying for jobs when I saw something that sounded interesting. Obviously I was looking for jobs that would provide an increase when it came to benefits and financial stability. I was looking for jobs where I could see an opportunity to promotion and growth. 

One day, I saw a job posting. It was a marketing job back in the corporate world. It was with a company I was somewhat familiar with through our nonprofit work. The more I researched the company, the more I saw a company that wants to give back to the communities it serves. I had seen this personally. I saw a company that promotes learning and growth. I saw opportunity. 

Going through the interview process only confirmed all of this. I was told about how the company promotes a healthy work/life balance and how they offer their employees time to volunteer and match donations given. I was walked through a benefits package with benefits that I had completely forgotten even existed but will be so valuable to me as a single mom. It was a lengthy interview process with quite a bit of paperwork, but I saw the value in everything and understood that the company wants to invest in the right person. I was super intrigued. 

I spoke to no one (almost) about the interview. I told no one who I was interviewing with. Deep down, I wanted it too badly but didn't want to get my hopes up by sharing it with everyone when I had no idea if the job would be mine. 

Then the call came. 

The job was offered to me. 

I was ecstatic. I was thrilled. This could finally be my opportunity to really find my footing, get a fresh start.
And then the question popped into my head. 

"Should I ask for more money?" 

I have only ever asked for more money with one job and that was because there were no benefits provided so it seemed like a fairly simple ask. I have never asked for more money due to my confidence in my skills. My lack of self-confidence has usually kept me from doing so. 

But I've read plenty of articles and seen studies about this. Men are much more likely to automatically ask for more money. Men are paid more than women in general. What is it that holds women back from asking the same for themselves? For me, it's been that self confidence. 

Thanks to the encouragement, advice and a pep talk from an amazing mentor, I understood that I only had one shot to ask for more money. One shot to advocate for myself. One shot to look out for my family and how I can provide for us.  

And so I did it. I called back and asked for more money. I even went a little higher, I figured if they were to come back and say yes, they'd offer me less than what I wanted. I was told that HR would need to discuss it the managers and they'd get back to me. 

I made this call right away in the morning. That whole day, I was on pins and needles, waiting for a call back. Nervous about what I had done. Wondering if I should have asked for less or maybe none at all? 

The call came around 4:45 that afternoon. I anxiously answered the call. And then I heard something I was not expecting. "We can do that." 

!!!!!!!

They were agreeing to give me what I asked for! The emotion that washed over me at that moment... wow. 

Not only was there a big relief of knowing how much I'll be able to support my family by myself, but there was this huge feeling of satisfaction and a self-confidence boost. Not only had I taken a chance to advocate for myself, I was shown that they believe enough in my skills and what I can bring to the company to give it to me. I can't explain the awesomeness of that feeling. 

For the first time in - who knows? forever maybe? - I was bursting with self-confidence. I was proud of myself. I felt respected as a professional. 

And it was over the next 12+ hours that I came to realize - why shouldn't I always feel like this? Why do I continue to doubt myself and my skills? Obviously I still have a lot to learn and I will make mistakes. But I shouldn't dwell on that, especially if it hasn't happened yet. We all make mistakes. But we should be confident in our mistakes, taking it as a learning opportunity. 

I got ready that next morning jamming out to the "Bad Moms" soundtrack which was probably the perfect playlist I needed. And here's where that page turn happened. I have the opportunity to go into this new job with a completely different attitude. I can walk in there confident. I can walk in knowing I'm valued. And because of that, I'll walk in there wanting and eager to do the best job I possibly can.

I wrote at the beginning of the year that 2017 was going to be the Year of Me. The Year of Liz. And while I plan on doing a recap at the end of the year to determine if I think it was a successful year of that or not, I think I've realized what my next step should be. And that next step should be to work on boosting my self-confidence. To take pride in myself and my work. 

I'm only starting to realize how much of a difference something like self-confidence can make. 

http://mindingherbusiness.co/ebook/

A Sense of Calling

So, some of you may know that for a long time I've struggled with this sense of a calling or passion when it came to jobs. Previous blog posts have outlined this... (Identity Crisis, Longing, Marketing & Branding and Thoughts from Bed)

I've worked at quite a few places over the past seven or so years. I think I have been successful in some and failed at a couple. At each job there were things that I loved and I have been very blessed to say that I've worked with some amazing people. But each job was missing something. Looking back, I'm not sure I could tell you exactly what it was, but it had to do with a sense of calling. 

Every time I found myself looking for new jobs (which seemed like a lot!), I would wonder: what am I doing with my life? What type of job do I want? What would fulfill me in a way that previous jobs haven't? I've always been jealous of those people to know what they're meant to be doing in life and even better, are doing it! I never had that. Each time I would apply for jobs, I would hope and pray that something would just pop out at me and say: "Liz! This is what you need to be doing! This is your job!" Needless to say, it wasn't happening. But still, I hoped. 

When GE decided to sell GE Capital, I decided I did not want to continue working collections under another company. Although I was in no big rush as there was no timeline in the sale at GE, I just started casually looking for jobs in Minnesota. Hey, no better time to move back to my home state, right? And so that's what I did. Occasionally looked for jobs, saving some, but applying to none. 

Then, what I had been praying and hoping for, finally happened. A job appeared on my screen. Communications and Volunteer Coordinator. At a non-profit. In my hometown. It was too good to be true! Being able to use my communications skills, working with volunteers, doing some good in the community and being close to my family. I started working on my application right away. 

It was seriously the only job I applied to during this time. I got a call before Memorial Day weekend asking me to come in for an interview. I stayed and talked with the director for an hour and half. I left feeling excited, feeling motivated and already brainstorming ideas. The next couple of weeks were hard, some issues pushed back the timeline and I was getting nervous that I wouldn't be offered the job. But then, the offer came. Again, with a minor set back, but I couldn't let this opportunity pass me by. I accepted. 

And now I'm here, on the job. My first two days were a whirlwind of HR paperwork and an overload of information. Partners for Affordable Housing is a fairly big organization but with a small staff. I quickly realized there was much to be done. I was overwhelmed with all the information about what we do as an organization and all the ways we help people, but also with the fact that there are so many more people we aren't helping. 

My first full week was another busy one. I learned that PAH has never really had a true Communications person on staff. A local agency generously donates time and services but this can only do so much. The organization itself has been around for a while so we have a good handle on what we do in the community. But the opportunity to tell our story - that is wide open. I have never been more excited to start a job. 

There's a lot that needs to be done before I can really begin to tell our story. Information needs to be collected, organization needs to done. I also have to figure out my time that will be spent as the Volunteer Coordinator (a job that will get busier once school is back in session). But the challenges that are before me are ones that I cannot wait to work on. I can't wait to start telling our story. I can't wait to bring more people in to volunteer and let them help share our story. I can't wait to be able to say that I am making a difference in the lives of the people we help every day. And I can't wait to say that one day, we will be able to help even more people. 

I honestly have never felt this type of excitement or passion in a job, especially right away. I have that sense of calling. That sense of passion. There is so much work to be done in our community when it comes to homelessness and the cost of living. I really want to help make a difference. I want to make people aware of these issues. I want to let people know how they can help. I feel a sense of value and purpose here. And this is what I have been missing. 

There is a lot of opportunity at Partners for Affordable Housing. Not necessarily to move up in positions, but to make a difference. To have an impact. And that is something I cannot wait to do. 

So help me get started! Like us on Facebook  and follow us on Twitter. Like and share and retweet to help us get the word out about what we do! #PAHlife 

An Update - what? :)

Okay. I know, I know. I have been basically non-existent on this thing for a few months. I don't know where the time has gone honestly. It's not like things haven't happened, because they have. But time just slips away. 

And quite honestly, I don't even know how to begin to tell you everything that's taken place over the past few months. I guess we'll start at the basics. I'm no longer at P&K Midwest. It just wasn't working out and after a couple months of unemployment, I accepted a job at GE Capital working corporate collections. To be completely truthful, I wasn't that excited about the job. It was just a job and I needed a job. But even after just the first week, I knew this would be more than just a job. Not because of what I would be doing, I still wasn't too thrilled about that, but I was excited to be working at GE. I quickly learned how amazing of a company it was and to this day, that hasn't changed. They really know how to treat their employees and that is why I've loved my job so much. And not only that, but I'm quite good at this job. I'm enjoying having a job with set goals to work towards and meet. It's so different from any other job that I've had and I'm really enjoying it. I was really excited to explore my options with GE and see where it could take me. However, just a couple of weeks ago, we got news that GE was selling GE Capital. We have no word yet on if we'll still have a job or if we do, who it will be with and that's pretty hard. The reason I love my job is because it's GE. I really don't know that I want to continue to do this for another company. 

So as much as I hate looking and applying for jobs, I've started the process again, although not a whole lot yet as I still have a job I enjoy. However, the potential bright side to this is that I'm finally looking for jobs in Minnesota. It's no real secret that I've always wanted to get back to Minnesota and closer to my parents at some point but I really didn't think it would be anytime soon. So we'll have to see what happens! 

When we first moved down here, AJ wasn't finding a teaching job and so he took at job at Tipton Structural Fabrication at their Cedar Rapids location as a CNC operator. He thrived at this job, picking up an entirely new career and just running with it. He learned everything so quickly, he even got promoted to an office position within a year of starting! He's such a hard working and really enjoying this new work too. 

It's funny how we're both in such different careers than we ever imagined we'd be, but also really enjoying it. Life is funny that way, I guess.

And Jacob. Oh, Jacob. This little boy keeps us busy. Keeps us on our toes. Keeps us tired. :) He is a boy always on the move, full on constant energy. He loves being outdoors, swinging or watching trucks go by. He loves to jump on the bed or rough-house on the couch. He's still a big Mickey Mouse fan but he's also a big fan of Big Block Sing Songs on Disney Jr. He also still loves to read books! And he's still a big talker. Always talking up a storm. While we know he's trying to talk more and we can understand some words, they're not always clear. We'll have to see if speech therapy is something in his future. 

Every day is an adventure with Jacob. He's at such a fun (and exhausting!) age right now! Every day I am amazed at something new he learns and I love watching him discover something new. His personality is coming through more and more and I hate to say, that he's gotten some stubbornness... but definitely not from me. Just his dad. ;-) He also still does his little "Jacob jig" which I can never get enough of! And that hair is finally starting to come in!

I feel like when I would think about doing a blog update, I would have so many more details to talk about. But now that I'm actually writing it, no details come. 

I will say that the past few months have been a challenge and an adventure. Life continues to throw curve balls and we continue to adjust to change. Just when we think we have Jacob figured out, something changes and it's like we're learning to be a parent all over again. It doesn't get easier. But now that Jacob has finally figured out how to call me "mama" or "Michael", it warms my heart to hear him say it every time. Or when I ask for a hug or a kiss and he comes straight to my arms. It is a feeling like none other in the world. 

I'll try to start blogging again on a more regular basis, so I can add in some more details on our life. We hope all is well with you. 

Long Overdue

This post is long overdue. I'm not even sure I'll be able to remember everything that's happened in the last couple of months! :) 

Since the last post, Jacob had another couple short bouts of sickness, including bronchitis. It took him a while to get over that one, we were doing breathing treatments for quite a while. He also got the hand foot and mouth disease from daycare but only had a small fever for one day and then was acting like his normal self again. He did get spots though all over his body and didn't really have any sores in his mouth, so I don't think he was in too much, if any pain. He also has eczema, so that made it look a little worse too. Since then though, he's been healthy! 

Jacob has grown and changed so much in the last two months! He's officially self feeding, no more pureed foods. I was still sending some to daycare but only to get rid of what I had in my freezer. Jacob loves to eat. And he can eat a lot! He's pretty good about chewing, but likes to shove a lot in his mouth and then he signs 'more' before he's even done chewing what he already has! He's really good about signing 'more' for us too when he's eating and in fact, has starting doing it now if we do something else he likes and wants to see more of. We just started working on signing 'please' with him too. He loves peas, carrots, cheese, chicken and strawberries. But he's a good sport and will almost always try something new. Sometimes he'll pick up a new food, try it, spit it back out only to pick it up again and put it right back in his mouth! Haha! We've also been spoiling him with the occasional marshmallow and ice cream cone. :) 

Jacob loves to go swinging and before it was really warm enough, he loved to kick his feet in the pool at Grandma and Grandpa's house. We did finally get him in the pool last weekend and he LOVED it. He splashed the entire time with a huge smile on his face! We also have a small ball pit (a $5 garage sale find) that he loves. Okay, mostly he loves just sitting in it and throwing all the balls out of it. :) But he's mastered climbing in and out of it on his own. He also still loves anything that makes noise or plays music. In fact, he's started to dance with the music, mostly swaying side to side or shaking his head, but it is too cute. He's also really figured out some of his toys. Like putting the rings on the stacker -   and then looking around waiting for us to clap for him. He also has this gear toy that turns the gears when you press a button and he's figured out where to put the gears to make them turn and he also likes to put them on the largest gear and watch them turn on that too. So smart! Jacob also enjoys opening and closing doors. If you're holding him, he'll make sure to help and when he's on the floor, he'll crawl to open it and then crawl to the door again to close it, curling his little toes so they're out of the way. 

He's still not walking but he is a crawling machine! And he can really zoom across the room when he wants! He's also really figured out how to get from a standing to a sitting position now so when we try to get him to stand and walk, he just plops his butt down if he doesn't want to. But he'll get there in his own time. He can pull himself into a standing position really great too. He also has 7 teeth, with an eighth close to cutting. Jacob loves to hear himself and is in a phase of screeching. He will screech to get our attention or when he wants more of something. It's cute at first, but gets old pretty quickly. :) He still talks a lot and sometimes it even sounds like he's singing. He also still does the Jacob Jig - which is when he gets really excited, holds his arms out and opens and closes his fists. It's the cutest thing! Sometimes he'll wave his arms around during songs and it looks like he's conducting! His new favorite song is the "Hot Dog Song" from the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. I found a YouTube clip of this one song on repeat for an hour and while I don't enjoy listening to it that long, it satisfies Jacob! 

As for Austin and myself, a lot has changed in the past two months as well. We've relocated (again) and are currently living with Austin's parents in Tipton. We were waiting to find a place to live until Austin found a job and now that he's working, we're looking for a place probably in the Mt. Vernon/Lisbon area. Austin has started working at Tipton Structural Fabrication as a steel cutter. Very different from teaching, very physically demanding, but he's really enjoying the change of pace. My job is still going great as well. It's getting easier and I'm understanding a lot more, but there is still a lot to learn! 

Well that's about it for now. I'm sure I could think of more things the longer I sit here but this is plenty. :) Our sweet baby boy turns one on Thursday and I'm still struggling to figure out where the past year has gone. But more on that in the next post... in about six months. ;-) 

9 Months Old

Note: I wrote this blog shortly after Jacob's 9 month check up, but never published it because I kept forgetting to get his measurements from the note at home to put in there! And now my baby is almost 11 months old! Oh well, better late than never! :) 

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I haven't been as good about keeping on top of this! But my little baby isn't such a little baby anymore. Jacob is 9 months old! He's officially been out in this world longer than he was inside of me. Crazy. And he's changing so much, every single day. I was just telling Austin last night that I feel like even in the past two or three days, Jacob has made huge strides in learning new things! It's such a fun stage to watch him learn, figure out new things, see how proud he is of himself and praise him for it all! :) 

I mentioned in the last post that Jacob had gotten sick and had an ear infection. Well that wasn't the end of it, unfortunately. At the end of that week of him being sick, Jacob picked up a separate stomach bug at daycare. It hit him on Friday night and he was throwing up quite a bit. We didn't even try any foods - just a lot of breastmilk. And then on Saturday night, it hit me and by Sunday, AJ. It took us all down. I have to tell you, that those 48 hours or so that all three of us were sick, were some of the worst. I've struggled quite a few times as a mom - we all do. But during that time of sickness, I didn't know if I would make it. It was that bad. Luckily(?) Jacob was still under the weather so he didn't need quite as much attention from us, which was good because we would not have been able to give it. But, thankfully, it passed. And we survived. And it took a good while for Jacob to really get back on track. When we had our follow up at the doctor, he still had an ear infection so we got some stronger medication for him. He seemed to like this one better and it finally knocked out that infection. But it took a couple weeks before he was back to eating normally again. 

At Jacob's 9 month check up, he did great! He did actually develop a rash over his body just like a day or so before we were suppose to go to the doctor so we were glad we already had the appointment scheduled. We also decided that "googling" baby rashes is not a great idea... ha! We were trying to figure out if it was from new foods we were trying with him, new laundry detergent or different water... we weren't sure. Luckily, the doctor told us it was just a post-infection rash that babies can get from being sick. It doesn't itch or bother Jacob at all and would go away on its own. Other than that, he is a perfect and healthy baby! His weight was 20lbs 4oz (67%), height 28" (33%) and head 18.5" (92%). Not really any weight gain from his 6 month check up but I think he lost some weight being sick and not eating like he normally was. So, a great appointment and no shots! 

Like I mentioned above, Jacob is in a really fun stage! He's learning so much! He's figured out how to clap and loves to make noise! He's still very much experimenting with his mouth and vocal chords and it's so fun to listen to him make all that noise! Although, maybe not when we're trying to watch TV. :) He also has really figured out some of his toys and it's so entertaining to watch him play. 

And we officially have a little mover on our hands. Jacob has finally figured out how to really move around. His crawl is a little unique and sometimes he'll crawl on one knee and one foot... silly boy. But he can effectively get across the room to get a toy or to come to mommy. :) And we're also quickly realizing how much more he needs to be watched and what types of things we can't leave laying around. Jacob has also been getting much better at standing without any type of support. You can see the determination on his face and he's working on his balance and sometimes he'll hold his breath! :) But he's able to stand by himself much longer. He can also pull himself into a standing position. He's done this in his crib, climbing up on Daddy or holding on to your hands. And when you walk with him, he wants to sometimes let go of your hands but don't quite have that balance yet. It won't be long before he'll be up and walking though! 

Jacob has also cut another tooth! His top right front tooth has peeked through and the left one is close to following. Hopefully this will help ease some of that teething pain, but he has been a biter lately. He bites our arms, fingers and he's biting while nursing. This is a behavior that we're having a hard time trying to stop, but we keep working at it. But I have to admit, with the biting during nursing, I have an internal struggle about continuing to breastfeed. I want to make it a full year, but I hate the biting and am so tempted to quit. I don't have enough in the freezer to get us through June and I also hate pumping so I don't think I'd have the drive to just exclusively pump. So for now, I continue to nurse while trying to teach my son the word "no". I must add, it doesn't help that when he hears us say no he tends to smile, giggle and try to continue doing whatever it is we want him to stop doing. Like, Jacob currently has this strange obsession with throwing himself backwards. He does it when he's on the bed or couch. But he also does in the highchair. Another behavior we're trying to stop. Oh, the joys of parenthood. :) 

Some other fun facts about Jacob: He LOVES the book "Good Night Moon". I mean, loves it. Every time we pull it out, he does his little hand grabbing motion and bounces in his seat. In fact, one time I just started reciting the book without it in the room with us and he looked all around trying to find the book! He also loves to help turn the pages! Bath time is still a favorite activity, especially trying to drink the water these days... He still likes the song "Six Little Ducks" as well. 

More than anything though, Jacob ADORES himself. Okay, so I don't know he really loves himself or just really loves that baby he keeps seeing in mirrors or on our phones. :) We started showing Jacob "the baby" in the bathroom mirror after his bath each night. He would get so excited to see this baby every time! And now, anytime there is a mirror, he loves to see the baby! And when we pull up old pictures or videos on our phones, he will just watch them or stare at the pictures, getting excited. But when we put the camera on so Jacob can see himself, he gets the most excited! He's a fan of selfies. :) It's too cute. 

Jacob is still a great eater. We've tried some fancier foods recently. Still a lot of chicken, but we've had corn chowder; minestrone; braised beef; veggies and cheese sauce; potatoes and peas; chicken with sweet potato and apple; potatoes with leek, carrot and peas; tomato, cauliflower, carrot and basil; and pasta and butternut squash, tomato and cheese. Very fun! And Jacob definitely eats better than Austin and I. Haha! We're also slowly starting to work on letting Jacob feed himself. He does great with puffs and these little biscuits called Mum-mums. But we need to start with small pieces of veggies or fruit for him to pick up by himself.  

Jacob has also slowly been getting better about sleeping. He's not always as fussy when it comes to going down for a nap or at night. It use to be where he had to be rocked or in the swing to fall asleep, or nursed to sleep. But he's been able to put himself to sleep just laying down some times. Austin even sent me a picture of Jacob sleeping on the floor in the living room - he had fallen asleep while playing! That has never happened. He still wakes up to feed at night so I haven't started any real sleep training yet - no point until I know he's capable of sleeping through the night. And when he does wake, he normally eats pretty good so I know he's still hungry. I'm not sure how exactly to start weaning these, maybe try feeding him more during the day or try offering a bottle of just some water at night? That'll be our next adventure though. 

Also, if you have some time, please check out our vimeo page! (link on the right sidebar) If you love videos and love Jacob, you'll love our vimeo page! :) There are plenty of videos to watch, as Austin pointed out to me the other day... 2 pages of personal videos and 9 pages of Jacob videos. I didn't see the problem! 

And in non-Jacob news (boring, I know). I've been at my new job for almost a month and so far I'm really loving every minute. I've really had to jump in with my feet to the ground and start running. It's a busy time of year with planting season soon starting so I've been thrown into a lot and have been kept busy. But I love it! I love being busy, I love learning new things, I love having a lot of projects to work on. I'm still getting comfortable with all the jargon and equipment but that will come in time. But I think this is going to be a really great fit for me. I've talked a lot on this blog about my calling and trying to figure out what I want to do and I have to say, I think this job is a step in the right direction. And that feels great.  

Some of this & that

These past few days have made me realized how truly blessed we've been with a healthy baby so far! This was the first time that Jacob has really been sick. Sure, he's had a couple small colds and one bout of pink eye, that luckily we caught right at the beginning and it was gone in just a couple of days. But this time, we had a sick little baby on our hands.

We noticed on Saturday morning that Jacob felt a little warm and when we took his temperature, it was higher than normal. Unfortunately, it stayed high all weekend and Jacob wanted to spend most of the weekend cuddling or just sitting or laying in someone's lap. Normally, he is a very active baby, always wiggling around and wanting to play. 

By Monday, Jacob still had a fever, a pretty bad sounding cough and a very runny nose. So it was off to the doctor for us! He had gotten a virus, which also caused a small ear infection and luckily we were given some medicine to start helping. But even with medicine, it was Wednesday before his fever was gone completely and he still had a runny nose and a small cough.

During these past few days, it broke my heart to see him sick and just cuddling/laying there, looking miserable. I so wanted to make him feel better, but didn't know how. The days were also exhausting. While Jacob did want to just cuddle and sleep, he couldn't always find a comfortable position. He would lean into me to cuddle but then sit back up crying. Then after a few seconds, he would cry again and lean in to cuddle. During the night, he would wake up screaming and crying and a couple of times, it took a long time to calm him down enough to get him to eat or back to sleep.

He would also scream bloody murder while giving medicine or getting the snot out of his nose. No fun. Although, we did learn a little something about Jacob. He likes to know things and/or have control of things. Example: when we first started giving him Tylenol for his fever I would come with the syringe and when I tried to give it to him, he would fight it and scream. If I brought over the medicine bottle and showed it to him, let him watch me put medicine in the syringe and then show it to him again before offering it to him, he would almost always open his mouth and let me give him the medicine willingly. Granted, this hasn't worked every time, but he's a smart cookie.

I really enjoyed being able to spend some extra time at home with Jacob, even if he was sick. And by Wednesday, he was feeling much better and wanting to play a lot more. And he is soclose to crawling! He will get up on all fours and rock back and forth before going back on his tummy. His head is also still a little heavy. :) But his overall balance is just awesome and if he falls over or onto his back, he is almost always able to get himself back into a sitting position! He also loves to try and pull himself up to a standing position! He does great "walking" across the room with us holding him up as well. Very soon, we're going to have a very mobile baby on our hands! Spring can't come soon enough so we can just have him run around outside!

Jacob also has a new favorite word! "DADA"! It's all I hear some days. :) And when I try to get him to say "mama", he will smile and laugh and say "dada" again! Silly boy. Although, I did use this to my advantage one day. I asked Jacob, "Jacob, who do you want to change your dirty diapers all day?" To which he answered, "Dada!" Good boy. :)

In other news, we will be seeing some change again soon. Seems like we can't ever have a year go by without something changing or something exciting happening or us moving. :) Some of you may know that I wasn't completely happy at my current job at Maple Manor (a nursing home and assisted living facility). I just haven't felt that I got all the necessary training to help me be truly successful in my position. So I was applying for other jobs. Well I am happy to announce that starting March 13th, I will be in a new position.

Even though I risk being disowned by my family - haha! - I will be the new Marketing Coordinator at P&K Midwest, a John Deere implement in Eastern Iowa. They have nine locations and I'll be responsible for the marketing for all nine locations. It's going to be a huge job and one that I'll need to hit the ground running, but it's going to be much more similar to what I was doing at Kruger Seeds and it's in an industry that I feel much more comfortable in. I'm very excited to see where this opportunity will take me.

For the time being, I'm going to be based out of the Waterloo office, but by summer, they want me based out of Mt. Vernon, which is about an hour and half south of us right now. So yes, we will be moving again. We really don't know all the details yet on where and when. Austin has already decided that he doesn't want to teach at D-NH again next year as he didn't feel like it was a good fit for him there. So he's looking into some possibilities closer to Mt. Vernon. After all, we figured I've followed him for his last two jobs so now it was his turn. :) The good news is that we'll only be about 30 minutes from Austin's parents but the bad news is that means we'll be farther away from my parents. So we've promised them many trips up to Minnesota. I joked with my mom that we'll just have to get a cabin in Minnesota to spend our summers there and she said "Yes, Megan's house!" Sounds like a plan to me! :)

So with this new adventure, I'm sure there are going to be challenges. But we've had a lot of challenges in life and I'm confident that God will provide and will be there to help us make this transition as smooth as possible. I'm hopeful that with these changes, better things will come for our family.

An end to 2013

2013 has been quite the year - to say the least. It has, by far, been the most exciting, challenging, wonderful, frustrating, thrilling, amazing, exhausting, surprising, incredible and miraculous year. We've made a lot of mistakes, learned some hard lessons, grown into parents and created a ton of memories.

We started the year by announcing we were expecting a little bundle of joy! It was great to finally be able to shout about it! :) And my morning sickness had pretty much disappeared so I was finally able to enjoy the rest of my pregnancy.

Austin had a very successful spring with his Choir at Riverside, which made it very bittersweet when he decided to accepted a new job so we could be closer to family. Saying goodbye to such a supportive community after three years was very hard and the longer we're away, the more we miss them. We also celebrated my sister's graduation from seminary, a major accomplishment!

In June, we welcomed Jacob into this world and everything changed. We immediately fell in love with this sweet little boy. We spent the summer adjusting to life as new parents, while also packing and getting ready to move. Luckily we have great family and friends who made all of this so much easier on us!

This fall Austin and I both started new jobs, which has been very challenging for both of us for different reasons. I think that we both agree while we love being closer to family, a big part of us wishes we were still back in Western Iowa. But every day, we grow and learn something new and hoping there's a shift and we can start enjoying what we do. We also celebrated 4 years of marriage in October. Hard to believe that much time has past already!

We're ending the year celebrating with family, remembering the good times from the past year but also ready to move on to new beginnings in 2014. And here's hoping we can do exactly that. Cheers.

Three Months and Everything's Changing

My little baby is three months old! And I'll say it again, time keeps moving way too fast! And I know I'm going to be saying this every time I post here! :) But it's been so much fun watching him grow and learn new things!

Jacob is becoming much more vocal, cooing at us, blowing bubbles, laughing and giggling, buzzing his lips and making random noises. And they are just the cutest things I've ever heard. I could sit and listen to him "talk" to me all day! Especially when he smiles when he talks! He's also getting much better at tummy time, not getting as mad when we put him down but sometimes even enjoying it! He's doing great at pushing himself up on his arms and looking around. And he's even been getting better at rolling over more quickly to his back! He has also rolled from his back to his tummy a few times, although he normally can't get that one arm out from under himself. But he likes to roll to his side a lot and then back to his back again. 
Jacob also loves to put things in his mouth, or try to put things in his mouth! He loves to chew and suck on his own hands. But his coordination is getting much better as well! He can pull some things towards him like blankets and certain toys, which he'll then try to put in his mouth. You can also see that he's trying to reach out and grab at toys around him. Sometimes he'll get them and others he'll just bat at them. We have a little activity chair for him that he's really starting to enjoy sitting in and play with the toys around him. 
He loves to move around all the time - laying down on his play mat, sitting on the couch or even while you're holding him. He will just kick his little legs and swing his arms all around. He's got some great strength in his legs too and is getting better at putting his weight on them when you hold him up. He's definitely going to keep us busy once he becomes mobile!
Overall, he's become much more aware of everything around him and a very active baby! He's a lot of fun to interact with now too because he'll interact back with you! We've decided he's becoming quite the charmer! Everyone who meets automatically falls in love with him! And it's easy to see why! :) 

In other news, Austin is keeping very busy at school. He's doing a fall musical and he's decided to do "Annie" this year. Rehearsals have started and performances are the first weekend in November, so they've got a lot of work to do. He's working with someone from the community to help with some of the drama so he can focus on the music side a little bit more, which is nice. He's also still learning about his students and they're trying to find a groove that fits together. The choir is very different from his choir at Riverside and so there's a learning curve. But I know, with time, they're going to find something that works and he'll be just as successful at D-NH, if not more! I think he's also enjoying teaching the third and fourth graders but would much rather be teaching middle school so he could build up the program more. We'll see if that's something he'll be able to do next year.  

And in case you haven't heard, I'm officially back in the workforce! I've started my new job as the Marketing Coordinator at Maple Manor Village in Aplington, Iowa, which is a nursing home and an assisted living home. A quick overview of what I'll be doing is of course all of their marketing (posters, ads, newsletters, etc.), event planning within the community and working on inquiries and referrals. This will actually be a good mix of my past two jobs - marketing, like I did at Kruger, and then going out into the public and being a face for the company, like I was for UNO. But this is in a totally different industry which means I have a lot to learn. But I think it's going to be a great new and exciting challenge and I'm really looking forward to working here. 

So this also means that Jacob has started daycare. We found a great in-home daycare in Dike, just two blocks from the school. It's run by a husband and wife who are both super nice. We love that it's so close to school, not too many kids, at someone's house but also still structured. I was having some pretty bad anxiety about having to leave Jacob at daycare for his first day, for a number of reasons. I had been able to spend three amazing months at home with him and those are days that I'll treasure forever. So it was going to be a big adjust me for me not to have all that time with him! I was also worried because he had been fighting sleep and would only fall asleep in my arms most of the time and I knew that was something he wouldn't be able to do at daycare. However, the first drop off wasn't nearly as bad as I originally thought. And of course Jacob did great! He's a champ! And all the other kids just loved him! They swarmed his carseat as soon as we got there! :) He's pretty much the center of attention! And daycare has been great for his sleeping habits!

Like I mentioned, Jacob was having a hard time going to sleep. He would be obviously tired but would fight it really hard. He would not fall asleep on his own, he would just cry and cry and I couldn't stand listening to him cry so hard, so I'd always go pick him up. So we tried swaddling, shushing, rocking, singing, walking, bouncing, going outside, putting him in a swing, opening the freezer door for a cool breeze... I tried it all. And it would take a combination of some of these. And then as a last result, I'd give him a little bit of gripe water and that would almost always calm him down enough for me to get him to sleep. But then I would hold him while he slept, if I tried putting him down, he'd wake up and cry. Even after just a couple of days at daycare, Jacob has been doing better. At daycare, they told me he'll cry for a little bit and then put himself to sleep! So I thought, okay, time to try it at home! Up until this point, Jacob had still been sleeping in our room too. So, the other night, I put him down in his crib while he was still awake, shut the door and waiting for him to start fussing. I expected him to fussy some, but he did nothing! He just fell asleep! I was amazed! The next night, I put him down again while he was still awake. This time he did cry for a bit, but eventually fell asleep again! We've even been putting him down in there for his naps over the weekend and it's been working out pretty good. 

I have noticed that since putting Jacob in his crib, he's been waking up more often to eat but I don't know if the two are related. I've read about the four month sleep regression and he's also had a bit of a cold so who knows what exactly is waking him up more often. But we're making progress in the right direction! And that's all that matters! It's been great having him in his own room finally too. We don't have to be quite as quiet when we're getting ready for bed and can stay up a little bit later, although we're almost always in bed when Jacob goes down! 

So, life is definitely changing and we're adjusting to a new life as two working parents. But I think it's all going well and we're going to like our new life. And it's so much fun watching Jacob change every day! I'm looking forward to seeing where life leads us! But it feels like things are starting to fall into place and we're finally getting some answers to our prayers, which is a great feeling. God is good.